Today my folks were over here for my birthday and I had it made still inside myself the last few months on the subject what I am really doing in this life. For them the matrrix is what life is of course. They don’t spend any words / reactions (‘positive” nor ‘negative’) ab-out when I mention the common sense Desteni material a.k.a. message and the works. Btw – if I could rate it I have had only one ‘negative reaction’ in one and a half years time from this character “Gibbon”.
They let me speak. When I shared on the eye of the needle he recognized it as from the bible – which is for me enough and makes it OK I do this and I can let go. It was my dad who told me as a child a zilion times not to make thoughts / mirages / illusions, to stay grounded on earth. Also he used the words common sense a lot when I was growing up, by which I never knew for whos benefit this was lol. So it is still between us which is best for all as for my process of realising selftrust as myself, allthough I don’t know what they really think. By having them worried, I make them sick – so I don’t want that, cause that keeps on circling in our minds otherwise. For I’m sure they want as all Equality = Freedom for All.
Still afraid to say something wrong (speaking thoughts – I was taught to only speak when I knew what what I was talking about:) I could stand up and correct them on some points – one of which is the fall a victim (victims) to the marketing world – I corrected that we allow and accept this by accepting and allowing this entire system. It was cool. So – to follow-up and stand up…
I honor my parents deeply and stand equal and one as them. My father for he ‘spared’ his ‘spare’ time to teach me to write and read when I was 3-4 years old and mom for allways coping with my whims on food for example … As a child I knew my father suffered from sadness / griefs on not being able to go explore more of self due to having to work in the family lumberyard – So this ‘sadness’ / mindness was giving onto me which I experienced as a child by having to cry a lot at night without really knowing why and weird as it was not being sad myself over that at the same time. These things I will come to understand more when I will go deeper and deeper into Past Time-Line Resonance Correction through letting go of ‘attachments’ unconditionally. Through reading the Desteni material I came to understand that my father / we people in general invoke(d) this by taking the soul for real – no wonder he has much ‘knee points’ to release as I have to release the ‘now of consciousness’.
(‘Now’ in dutch sounds as tight, narrow, small, cramped, narrowly)
I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself all my life to be afraid of saying something wrong and stupid.
I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to be afraid of speaking thoughts.
I stop thoughts, feelings and emotions.
“Understand that – to assist and support self within stopping the existence of self within the definition of ‘Life’ being that of having a Personality that define self as being ‘Individual’ within the living of self as a Ego-Persona of Mind – the definition that is infused/amalgamated within/as self through this ‘Tree of Life’-System = is to investigate and identify ‘personality-definitions’ self… has accepted as self within the definition of‘who I am’ that is lived as self through the Mind Consciousness System. This is done through observing/remembering one’s grandparents and parents – that will reflect to self personality-definitions self has copied from them, that self is currently existing as. Personality will be seen within, for example behaviour, mannerism, physical-actions, speech, body-language etc. – all such traits which form the entire definition of self, self exist as through the Mind, reflected from one’s parents and grandparents. To stop existing as such habits of manifested personality-traits defined as ‘living’ ‘life’ –
but manifest self equal and one as all here as self-expression and actually live as Life equal and one as all.”
Video by Bernard Poolman: